i spent most of yesterday re-journaling our Kiev trip since i left my real journal on the flight home. :) yea.. i'm awesome like that.
i've been on a lot of missions trips, and i think this was the toughest so far.
i'm still processing. learning. the hardest thing so far has been coming face to face with my attitude during the trip. i love our team. but in all honesty, i think we messed up. we had some tremendous opportunities to show each other the love and grace of Christ... and we blew it. i'm disapponted in myself. in the ways i reacted to things, and the ways i let other peoples attitudes determine my reactions. i know better than that. i know that missions trips are unpredictable. i know we won't be prepared, i know schedules will change, i know communication will be tough, i know that half of the things we *do* prepare won't be relevant once we get where we're going.
i know all that.
and yet i grumbled and complained. and never spoke up when others did the same thing.
i'm disappointed.
in myself. in us.
"they will know your are my disciples by your love for one another."
yea... we messed that one up.